As though being handed 40 years is not enough.. Jessica has been dealt yet another blow and it's sent her into a deep depression. Jessica has a 2 yr old son named JJ (short for Jesse James, his mothers name and fathers name combined) well, my youngest daughter is adopting him and has just announced that she is changing his name :( This on top of her refusing to let Jessica see her son, has really done a number on her mindset. We are Christian women, so we prayed for the Lord to help us forgive this wrong, and to help us get through the next week. I promised Jessica that I would keep a photo album for JJ with his original birth certificate and all the "new mommy" photo's that Jess has, so that when he's grown he can learn the truth. Please pray for Jessie, her heart is broken over this news as is mine. There is no reason to change his name, this is a family adoption, not a closed adoption, not an adoption to an unknown family....
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Sandra, yes, I understand your point and I'm sure what you describe is true for many...I wish it was as cookie cutter as that for us. Our family has no qualms regarding the actual adoption.. my grandson is happy and he is healthy... it's the fact that she is changing his name and refusing to take him to see his mother. Lets back track a little... shortly after Jess was incarcerated, within days actually, she was diagnosed bi-polar and the psychiatrist said she "had a break from reality" .. apparently for many years (she hid it very well) she was hearing voices and seeing "shadowy figures" and self medicating... yes, what she did was stupid, irrational, irresponsible and for those of us with our wits about us, unfathomable... I don't want to sound like I'm making excuses for Jess, but I am.. it was only after her sentencing that I found out that she tried getting psychiatric help by way of checking into 3 different mental health facilities on 4 different occasions, in the months before she broke... Not many want to acknowledge this fact, much less understand it for what it is. It had nothing to do with being selfish or not loving her son.. she loves him more than life. It's all so very sad and what her sister is doing, the way she is handling this, is wrong and hurtful and completely unforgiving... This is a travesty in every sense of the word. Jessica fell through the cracks in the system... the system failed her and she is suffering now because of it. She is being treated now, and with wonderful results, she has accepted her responsibility for what she did, and she is and will pay her debt to society without question... I think what hurts her the most is that she thought she and her sister had an unbreakable bond, that they would always be there for each other... she thought her sister loved her unconditionally. It's the reality of this that is bringing her the most pain... as for me, her pain is my pain and like her, I cannot understand why my younger daughter is behaving the way she is in spite of the hours, the days and the months of trying to talk to her and help her understand. I didn't raise my children to turn on each other in their hour of need... My pain is realizing that I failed.
Renee, she is changing his name because she "doesnt like it" and has a hatred for his father... She is giving my grandson her boyfriend's middle name Michael ... still not sure if his last name will remain, or if she's giving him her boyfriends last name as well...
Stacy, JJ's father is MIA - has been since before all this happened... his parental rights severed by the courts after repeated attempts to locate him... Jessica "voluntarily" gave up her rights although the courts would have severed them anyway. He will always be "Jesse James Wood" ... I decided last night to get a tattoo with this name and his birthdate... nobody can erase that - ever.
I just wanted to add I like the name Jesse James. I think that was clever using both parents names combined. Is the father not concerned about the name change? Maybe if he could voice some input it might change the younger daughter's mind. Certainly keep calling him what he is used to.
.big hugs for you today.
I am so sorry to hear this. Of course news like this would be hard to take. With my situation, I have been told they were going to change my grandson's name. I just said, "whatever". He is still my grandson. He is still my son's son. Nothing, Nothing can change that. Main thing is the baby boy is loved, fed, clothed, taken to the doctor, etc. When he is older, he will most certainly seek Jessica out. So let's pray Jessica prepares for that day and allows her own heart to heal from all these hurts.
She's changing his name from Jesse James Wood to Jesse Michael ??... I have no idea if she's keeping his last name (yes hers is Wood also) but... the new middle name is that of her boyfriend's, for all I know she's changing his last name to his as well. No, they are not married. It's just heartbreaking - there is absolutely no reason for the change except that she "doesn't like it" ... I confronted her about it, saying.. he is not a puppy that you're adopting from the pound!! He doesn't need a new name - he has a name, the one his mother gave him, and he is 26 months old now.. he's been "JJ" all his life