My son is 22. He has never been to prison, but to jail numerous times in the last 4 years since he turned 18. Here's a list that I can remember of his arrest. 5th degree theft, driving without a license(a few times), public intox, giving alcohol to minors, mouthing off to officers, biting an officer(he's lucky they didn't shoot him, driving while barred-habitual offender, drunk driving, domestic abuse 2x both attacking my husband(his dad), failure to appear, probation violations. Right now he's in jail with 1st degree theft charges, driving while barred-habitual offender and some minor traffic violations and 2 probation violations. I think he is looking at prison time now. He has not been easy to deal with. My husband understandably is fed up and filed papers so he cannot come to our apartment or on the property or he'll be charged with trespassing. I do not want him to live here, but I wish that at some point he could come for family dinners. I know if I let him in he won't leave, in my head I know that, but my heart has not caught up to that yet. He has trashed our apartment, stolen money from us over the years, and who knows what else. My husband would be just fine if he never saw Charlie again, so would my in-law's. My in-law's do not even claim him as a grandson or nephew anymore. When asked how many grandchildren there are they list the number minus 1. My parents still claim him and talk to him, but my sister is not nice. She says everything he has ever said or did is a lie, which is not true. He is our only child. We adopted him when he was 8 years old. We started out with a bad situation, but I thought(foolishly) that love and family would help him. I'm a teacher and I hope no one ever finds out about my son. It wouldn't look good that I raised a criminal, but I'm teaching their kids? We just moved to this suburb a year ago so most people don't know our son, which helps. It's just so hard when people ask where does your son live? I just tell them the city where the jail is and change the subject. What's even worse is seeing all of the family pictures at Easter and college graduation pictures and the praises for my friend's kids on facebook as those kids do wonderful things or get married, or have babies. This morning my son said he could get 25 years and I realized if that happens I could die before he gets out(I'm 52) and I'll never get to be a grandma. Stupid stuff like that runs through my head. I doubt he would serve all 25 years, but you never know.
I'm just glad to have a place where I can vent without judgment and around other people who will understand, that my son may be in jail/prison but that does not lessen my love for him. No matter what I'll always be his mom.
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